The No-Plot Show!
by Jigglyman
Summary: This story has no plot, so what can I say? (rated PG for swares by the empty seat)
1. The Beginning Laugh

**A/N: **This is my first attempted humor fic. Please be nice.

By Jigglyman

**Mr. Announcer: **Welcome all of you guys…

**Zelda: **Ahem…

**Mr. Announcer: **And girls…

**Pikachu: **Ahem…

**Mr. Announcer: **And Pokémon…

**Fox: **Ahem…

**Mr. Announcer: **And… oh, forget it! Welcome Smashers…

**Alien: **Ahem…

**Mr. Announcer: **Welcome all living things that are presently here…

**A Rock: ** Ahem…

**Mr. Announcer: **What the…? Okay… Welcome, all objects…

**An Empty Seat: **Ahem, brainiac.

**Mr. Announcer: **What are you supposed to be?

**An Empty Seat: **Wind, you dimwitted dork from hell.

**Mr. Announcer: **Okay… that's weird…

**An Empty Seat: **Shut the hell up, Miyamoto wannabe… wait a minute! I said I was Wind!

**Jigglyman: **You look like An Empty Seat to me…

**An Empty Seat: **Why you…

**Robot Voice: **10 minutes later.

**Jigglyman: **_(with a black eye)_ I never knew wind could be so strong…

**An Empty—I mean, Wind: **Damn right we are.

**Mr. Announcer: **_(desperate) _Welcome all of you bits and pieces of matter!

**Young Link: **Ahem…

**Mr. Announcer: **_(roaring) _WHAT NOW?

**Mini-Elfy: **_(whimpering) _I… I… just wanted to be noticed… and don't you damn ever call me Mini-Elfy!

**Jigglyman: **_(sarcastic) _Oh no, I'm so scared…

**Robot Voice: **10 minutes later…

**Jigglyman: **_(with two black eyes)_ Ouch…

**Mr. Announcer: **_(really desperate) _Welcome all whose favorite food is chocolate cockroaches inside rotting bananas!

_(crickets chirp)_

**Donkey Kong: **I like bananas…

**Peach: **SCISSORS!

**Mr. Announcer: **Finally… now, I would like to talk about the strategies of the north-north-west side of the stage of Final Destination. It seems that that spot is 4.5 millimeters above…

**Robot Voice: **For 10 minutes, Mr. Announcer drove on and on, catching only Mewtwo's interest, as shown:

**Mr. Announcer: **Yes, but Mario's Fireball will almost always (87%) knock the opponent 0.789 meters away…

**Mewtwo: **True, but you are forgetting my theory when Falco goes to the bathroom at 3:34 PM, Mario will create a nuclear explosion, therefore knocking the opponent back 0.7890000001 meters…

**Robot Voice: **So, 10 minutes later…

**Mr. Announcer: **…and thus, that concludes it.

**Robot Voice: **Suddenly, a giant gerbil assassinated Mr. Announcer.

**Everyone: **YAY!

**Robot Voice: **Then the gerbil's friend, Mr. De-Humidifier, assassinated Jigglyman!

**Everyone: **YAY!

**Robot Voice: **Which therefore meant the story had to stop.

**Everyone: **BRING BACK JIGGLYMAN!

Will Jigglyman me brought back? Should I be writing this right now? Is this actually having a real plot? Tune in next time for another episode of Monty Python's Flying Circus! Wait a second, that isn't right…


	2. Can't Have a Plot, Remember?

**Chapter 2: **Can't Have a Plot, Remember?

**Robot Voice: **_'…apparently Bean remembered it, too, for his voice came over the headset, saying, "Remember, the enemy's gate is down."…' _ Oh! Eh… this is still our lunch break, you know, Jigglyman!

**Jigglyman: **Well, inside a de-humidifier, you can't keep track of time…

**Robot Voice: **Later…

**Link: **I want Jigglyman back.

**Y. Link: **Yeah! Our names are already shortening.

**Pea.: **SCISSORS!

**Y. L.: **Don't waste our script with meaningless lines.

**L: **Yeah!

**: **But-a Link, you're-a wasting it-a too-a.

Yeah, so… what the hell? Jigglyman! No one knows who I am!

**Jigglyman: **So?

Hey, how come he gets a full line?

Damn you, Jigglyman!

Yeah!

KILL HIM!

**Jigglyman: **_(runs)_

**Robot Voice:**10 minutes later…

**Jigglyman: **_(with three (what the?) black eyes)_ Happy?

**Link: **No.

**Jigglyman: **_(with four you-knows) _How 'bout now?

**Master Link the Great: **Will do.

**Master Young Link the Great: **Jigglyman, how did you get out of Mr. De-Humidifier?

**Stupid Peach who says "SCISSORS!": **PLIERS!

Lowly Stupid Out-of-Style Worthless Jigglyman: That would create a plot, remember? 

**Master Mario the Great: **Oh-a. We-a see.

**Master Mewtwo the Great: **Why is everyone entitled "Master … the Great"?

**Master Link the Great: **Revenge.

**Master Mewtwo the Great: **Ah.

**Master Kirby the Great: **Isn't this kind of getting annoying?

**Everyone Else: **NO!

**Master Kirby the Great: **Jigglyman, could you turn me back?

**Jigglyman: **_(fixes) _Okay, Kirby.

Master Kirby the Great: Hello, Jigglyman? 

**Dora the Explorer: **I'm trying… it isn't working!

**Furby-Kirby: **Why is everyone making fun of our titles?

**Ping-Pong Spaghetti Link: **Because Jigglyman is too lazy to think up anything else.

**Robot Voice: **Suddenly, a surprising thing happened!

_(crickets chirp)_

**Robot Voice: **I _said_, a surprising thing happened.

**Fox in Socks on Box: **Oh, yeah.

**Mr. Wizard-Dude: **Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

**Pichu Beat You: **_(pouts) _How come he gets a good name?

**Jiggly Iggly Wiggly Sigglypuff: **Yeah, …wait, what is your name?

**Mr. Wizard-Dude: **My name is… do your really want to know?

**Everyone: **Yes!

**Mr. Wizard-Dude: **Do your _really_ want to know?

**Everyone: **YES!

**Mr. Wizard-Dude: **Do your _REALLY _want to know?

**Samus Hippopotamus: **_(holds up blaster cannon) _Yes already!

**Mr. Wizard-Dude: **It's… uh… I forget.

**Everyone: **_(holds weapons) _What did you say?

**Mr. Wizard-Dude: **Oh yes… uh… _(gulps) _Bob.

**Everyone: **Noooooooooo…

**Mr. Wizard-Dude whose name is Bob: **I am your father!

_(silence)_

**Mr. Wizard-Dude whose name is Bob: **Damn.

**Random Guy in the Audience (R-GITA): **Kill Bob!

**Everyone: **Yes, sir, R-Gita!

**"Bob": **Meep!

Heh… heh… that was… confusing! 10 points to the guy who can guess what Robot Voice was reading in the beginning! Ta ta!


End file.
